The football magic

8^th May 2012.

As he left the stadium, Ravi Gupta kept repeating the same line again and again, “Why did Malinga bowl a no-ball?” It cost Mumbai the match!” As his sympathy for Mumbai continued, the repent for spending a hefty amount from his salary for the ticket was visible on his strawberry-shaped face. He kept tucking his shirt in his trousers, while his bulging tummy did its best to fall outwards.

Walking away dejectedly, he reached Girgaon Chowpatty. It was close to midnight and the area was illuminated only by the stars that twinkled merrily in the sky.

Walking along the shore, Ravi felt like something hit his right leg.

“What's that?” said Ravi, scratching his head. He removed his torch-cum-ball pen from his shirt pocket and tried to look out what lied on the sand.

The light slowly increased as he saw a glowing football.

“Oh! A football! But how come it is so shiny?”

Ravi tried kicking it.

Suddenly, there was a loud sound. A glittering gas released from the football. The wind started blowing very fast, as if it was coming from a table fan.

“What is it? What’s happening?”

“UDIBABA!!!!! I am Gen-X Genie.! I am here to make your wishes come true.”

Ravi wondered how come the typical genie from the Arabian Nights is in front of him.

“Genie? In a football? You people usually come out magic lamps, closed bottles, etc. Right?”

“Why cannot we stay in a football? If criminals can be in the Parliament, film stars on the cricket field and cricketers acting in movies, why cannot we people in a football?”

“Ok, calm down..Here, have some water...” said Ravi.

The Genie emptied the bottle in no time. ”Thanks for the water. Global warming is not sparing even our community. It is so hot even at midnight” said Gen-X.

“Have you settled down, so that I can ask for my three wishes?”

“Not three, only two.”

“Why only two?”

“Recession, my friend. We have cut down the number of wishes from three to two. Take it or forget it!”

“No, two are enough for me.”

“Then my friend, what is your first wish?”

“I want Mumbai to win the Indian Publicity League. Please.”

“Sure, just wait a minute. “

Genie removed his Blackberry phone.

“Hello. Mr. Bookie?”

“Speaking. Who’s this?”

“I am Gen-X Genie. One of my clients wishes that Mumbai must win the IPL. Please fix the match accordingly. I will fulfill one of your wishes in return.”

“Ok, it will be done. Bye” said the bookie as he disconnected the phone.

“Your wish will be fulfilled. Mumbai will win the IPL. Make sure you watch the final.” said the smiling Gen-X.

“But how come you did it so easily?” asked Ravi.

“My friend, you people use the phonebook. We have got the contacts! Second wish?”

“Gen-X, I want to live the most luxurious life in the city.”

“Wait a minute, have you shot down many innocent people at CST station?”

“No, not at all.”

“Then you are cannot ask for this wish. The man, who has done so, is currently living the most luxurious life in the city. In order to fulfill the wish, you must have more credentials to your name than him.”

“Shit! It is near impossible to be as lucky as him. Let it be.”

“Any alternate wish?

“If not luxurious, I want to live a relaxed life. No work, just lazing out all the time. Please fulfill this wish. “

“Alright, no work at all…I get that. Here it goes.”

Gen-X rubbed his hands and read out a magic charm:

“HUMPTY DUMPTY SAT ON A WALL; HUMPTY DUMPTY HAD A GREAT FALL!

TAKE THIS MAN TO SUCH A PLACE; WHERE HE DOESN’T HAVE TO WORK AT ALL!”

With a flash of lightning, Gen-X disappeared along with the football.

Ravi’s wish was indeed fulfilled. He reached a place where there was no work at all.

He was in a government office.